‘He had a way with the kids’: Honor recognizes coach’s lasting influence

By John Shaughnessy

Ali Leffler believes you can learn a lot about a person by the way they coach children and youths. That belief is part of the reason she has always thought so highly of Jay Scheil.

“He had a way with the kids,” says Leffler, noting that Scheil coached her daughter, Scout, for a few years in basketball in the archdiocese’s Catholic Youth Organization. “Some coaches yell or get angry or get upset with the kids. He was respectful and respected.

“He coached a lot of teams, and a lot of them made it to the city championship. He definitely let them use their independence and skill to succeed. He’d tell them, ‘Just do it, girls. You don’t need me.’ Even though they did. And he wanted them to have fun.”

His approach to coaching was one of the bittersweet memories that Leffler shared about Scheil, who died on

June 19, 2025, at the age of 62. His coaching style was also one of the reasons that Leffler recommended to the athletic committee at Nativity of Our Lord Jesus Christ Parish in Indianapolis that they needed to nominate Scheil for the St. John Bosco Medal, the highest honor that the archdiocese’s CYO awards an outstanding volunteer.

“I was the first to say he needed to be awarded this award,” she says. “Even before he passed away, he was deserving of this honor.”

The CYO made it official during its Volunteer Awards Ceremony on May 12 at SS. Peter and Paul Cathedral in Indianapolis, honoring Scheil posthumously.

Scheil’s wife of 30 years, Betty, accepted the honor with their four children, Maddie, Parker, Abbey and Gabby.

The Scheil and Leffler families have been friends for at least 14 years, coaching each other’s children. Ali and her husband Nate also shared the similarity with Jay and Betty of having three daughters and one son. And Ali and Jay served on Nativity’s athletic committee for eight years together.

“He loved to give back through athletics,” says Leffler, noting that Scheil continued coaching and serving on the athletic committee even after his children no longer participated in CYO.

“He loved the kids, and he loved Jesus. It was part of his life. To volunteer your time for so many years, you have to have a love for Jesus, kids and athletics—and adults. Because you’re helping adults too, not just kids. You’re helping the parents. You’re helping the school. He always was a positive presence.”

Leffler remembers her friend’s humor, goodness and joy.

“He was just a happy-go-lucky soul,” she says. “He did so much. And he was still doing it when he passed away. He always wanted the best for the kids, and he wanted the most for the kids. And he wanted the most out of the kids.

“He just continued to give.” †

Related story: CYO recognition highlights volunteer efforts of adults and youths