A lesson from his childhood leads a coach to do ‘what is right’ for others

By John Shaughnessy

For good and bad, the lessons we learn in childhood often stay with us for a lifetime. And Dan Dugan learned a lot growing up in foster care since he was 2.

One of the best lessons he learned came from his aunt, the twin sister of his mother.

Life had dealt Dugan’s mom some crushing realities that she wasn’t able to cope with, heartbreaks that devastated her and prevented her from being the mother she hoped to be. As for his aunt, she was a mother of five, and even though she wasn’t able to take Dugan in full-time, he was able to live with her during some summers.

“She came out of the Depression, no high school education, and she cleaned houses for a living,” Dugan recalls about his aunt. “If she knew another family needed $30, she’d say, ‘I got 20 bucks.’ Then she’d find the other $10 and just give it all away. I learned from her that you’re supposed to be doing what is right.”

That lesson has always guided Dugan in his 36 years as a member of St. Therese of the Infant Jesus (Little Flower) Parish in Indianapolis, especially in his coaching of the parish’s Catholic Youth Organization teams in football, basketball and wrestling.

“I’m a firm believer that when you see something and it’s not right, you need to try to make it right in some way or another,” Dugan says. “It doesn’t mean it’s going to be perfect, but when you see something, leave it better than what you found it. And that goes with how you deal with young people. If you’re lucky to be around them—even if they have issues—try to help them be better during the time you have with them.”

That approach and his longtime commitment to children and youths have led the archdiocese’s CYO to recently award Dugan with the St. John Bosco Medal, the highest honor that the organization gives a volunteer.

Considering some of the challenges that Dugan had to wrestle with in his young life, it seems fitting that the sport that is closest to his heart is wrestling.

As he talks about his involvement in the Eastside Crusaders wrestling program—drawing children from the Indianapolis parishes of Holy Spirit, Little Flower and Our Lady of Lourdes—he focuses on the individual demands of the sport and the commitment to improve. One of his favorite stories also reveals his heart for the underdog. It’s about a boy in his first year of wrestling.

“He was getting annihilated every match, and then he wins one in triple overtime in the city tournament. It was the best match of the day. It was good for that young man. See, if you stick with it, you can make it. It’s always good to see at the end of the year that they’ve gotten better.”

The connection to his childhood goes deep.

“I made it through it,” he says. “That’s one of the things that drives me. I’m one of those coaches who says, ‘Little Joey might be a handful, so give him to me.’ I talk to them and say, ‘Hey, this is what I want for you. Will you do that?’ If they say yeah and they don’t, I tell them, ‘I have to hold you accountable because you said you’d do it. What are we going to do to make that happen?’

“I’m not saying you have to succeed but if you go out there and just don’t try, you’re just wasting everybody’s time.”

Dugan makes the most of his time. Besides coaching at Little Flower, he has served on its parish council, helped at its festival, run its Mother’s Day breakfast for more than 20 years, and been a member of its athletic board, including serving as its president.

“Dan is a person who does everything, always being there to help with whatever it takes to make it an enjoyable experience for everyone,” a fellow coach said in nominating him for the St. John Bosco Medal.

Dugan deflects the praise. Instead, he boasts about the difference his wife of 40 years, Marty, has made to the parish. And there’s obvious pride when he talks about how his daughters, Amanda and Bridget, coach in the CYO.

“There’s no way I could be up at Little Flower as much as I am without my wife and my family supporting me,” Dugan says. You just can’t do it by yourself.”

Love of family is at the heart of all he does, and his embrace of what he considers family extends in many directions.

The impact and the lessons of his childhood continue—for good. †

 

Related story: CYO recognition highlights volunteer efforts of adults and youths